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Five Signs Your Child’s Elementary School Principal Might Have A Drinking Problem

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Scott Barbour, Getty Images

The principal of Pioneer Park Elementary School in Cheyenne was arrested and charged with public intoxication and obstructing police last weekend. The courts will decide the verdict. Guilty or not, it’s the latest in a long line of embarrassing incidents involving teachers and administrators in Laramie County School District #1.

Here are five warning signs that may indicate your child’s principal has a drinking problem:

1. Instead of driving, they catch a ride home on the bus.

2. They are overheard singing Journey songs on the intercom.

3. During Parent-Teacher conferences, they hug you and say, “I love you, man.”

4. Your kid’s third-grade spelling list includes the word “Jagermeister”.

5. In the cafeteria, they ask the lunch lady for a “Crunchwrap Supreme.”

Honorable Mention: In math class, your child is instructed to convert proof into a percentage.

 

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