What if Longmire Was a Greenie?
When I was watching the trailer for the “final chapter” of Longmire, a strange thought hit me, "What if Longmire was from Colorado instead of Wyoming?" God, forgive me, but it only got weirder and dumber from there.
With apologies to Craig Johnson, What if Longmire was a Greenie?
- 1
He Wouldn't Drink Rainer
Instead of drinking Rainier, he would totally drink Fat Tire. He would develop a deep penchant for microbrews. So, it would definitely be the fave mircro from Colorado's New Belgium Brewery.
- 2
Say Goodbye Longmire, and Hello Bongmire
His name would be Bongmire. Enough said? If you’re not aware of what 420 is code for, let’s call it an ongoing cannabis culture. Buffalo, Wyoming’s biggest summer festival is Longmire Days, but Boulder could have Bongmire Days.
- 3
He Would Have to Deal with Hippies
Instead of visiting the Reservation, he’d have to deal with hippie commune organic farms. Colorado Communes Facebook says they just "share information on sustainability and promote people living sustainable." Okay, we’re all for what's good for you - and good for ya.
- 4
Bronco Goes Suburu
Walt would drive a Subaru Outback with a Ski rack in the land of Greenies. Although Longmire’s Bronco would fit in almost in some spots, Bongmire would cruise the vehicle you are most likely to see... An Outback with a ski rack, it has a greenie plate with a Coexist sticker.
- 5
Henry's Place Would Be Gentrified
Henry, his bar-owner friend, would run a free trade coffee house featuring the finest grounds from around the world. After sundown, Henry serves wine and tapas. And Bongmire just loves the place.