Between Hillary Clinton and our next president, the most riveting soap opera since Dynasty has ended. Wait, is the real fun just now beginning? At least the campaigns caused way too much stress, created a whole new vocabulary we don’t use in Wyoming, and just exhausted us.

Political experts talk about the first 100 days in office, but Trump is ready to make noise before the first 100 minutes. Here are the "teriffic," but somehow appropriate and maybe even believable, things The Don will do.

Knock down the walls in the Oval Office so he can hang a specially-commissioned 300-foot-high, gold-framed picture of himself as a centaur. And that doesn’t even cover how The First Melania might makeover a dump to the Trumps.

Call All Media That Isn't Fox News, "A dizahhhstah."

Begin drafting an explanation how it’s Hillary’s fault the wall he’s doesn’t go up.

Change the nuclear codes to “W-R-O-N-G-!”

Appoint Chris Christie as Secretary of Overall Strategy.

Instead of “President Trump,” he may insist on “Herr Trump.”

Change the national anthem to include more references to his name.

Spell out his foreign policy plan in a series of 3 a.m. tweets.

Imprison Alec Baldwin for his impression of him.

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