Wyoming Grizzlies Have Bountiful Human Hunting Season [Satire]
A bit controversy surrounds the issue of hunting grizzly bears in the state of Wyoming. But isn't it a curious little fact that not much attention is given to the state issuing hunting tags to the bears.
We called the Wyoming Department Of Fish & Game and asked them how many tags were sold to bears during tourist season. They swore to us they had no idea.
"Can't you go look it up," we asked. "No really who is this," asked the state representative on the phone. "Is this Bob? We are tired of your crank calls Bob."
In the summer of 2017 alone there were multiple bear attacks reported. Every year these attacks begin around Yellowstone and the Tetons at what the state of Wyoming calls "Tourist Season," and the attacks cease right at the end of said "Tourist Season." Coincidence?
So, how many human tags does the state issue to bears every year? That number, while not exactly known, seems to depend on how many tourist are estimated to show up every year. The more tourists there are, the more bear attacks there are. That must mean the number of tourist tags issued to bears is based on the number of out of state visitors that year.
We will continue our investigation into this matter as soon as the Wyoming Department Of Fish & Game unblocks our phone number.
Until then all we can report is that the bears had a very good hunting season this year.