The Five Best Places For A Nuclear Storage Facility In Wyoming [OPINION]

Wyoming is strapped for cash and some folks think the Cowboy State can diversify its economy by storing nuclear waste. For now, the plan is off the table, but if and when lawmakers approve a nuclear storage facility, here are five potential sights.

1. Pavillion - The drinking water in this tiny Fremont County town has reportedly been toxic for decades. The EPA even warned residents to use fans after bathing to lower their risk of contamination, which makes Pavillion an ideal place to store nuclear waste.

2. PhinDeli Buford - America's smallest town was purchased in 2012 by Vietnamese businessman Phạm Đình Nguyen, who renamed it for his PhinDeli coffee company and then abandoned it. The storefront between Cheyenne and Laramie on Interstate 80 has been boarded up since 2017 leaving plenty of space to bury a few thousand barrels of spent plutonium. Fun fact: if you ever had the PhinDeli coffee, it tasted like nuclear waste.

3. Thorofare Station - The most remote location in the lower 48, Thorofare is over 20 miles from the nearest road in the southeastern corner of Yellowstone National Park. If we're gonna have a nuclear storage facility, why not put it as far away from people as we possibly can?

4. The Jackson Hole Town Square - In the unlikely event there was an accident, the clean-up would cost billions. Storing nuclear waste under the iconic elk antlers would give the well-heeled part-time residents in the Tetons an incentive to pick up the tab.

5. Under the Wyoming State Capitol - The recently renovated Capitol already has an underground tunnel nobody is using. Why not store some nuclear waste in the vaults downstairs? It couldn't smell any worse than the government waste coming from the legislature.